Today started out well. Woke up early to write my script for a spanish video project. After i finished, i got dressed, ate breakfas and was ready to go to practice then shoot the video when i was no longer able to go. the rest of my morning was rather bleak and after a couple hours, my cousins, who are visiting from mexico, came over. Now they obviously only speak spanish. I prefer not speaking spanish, so obviously i have not talked to them at all. Meeting family is one of the things i enjoy least. I hate it when my parents force me on the phone with some relative i never even knew existed. and now my parents are telling me to talk and become friends with cousins who, until 2 weeks ago, i never even knew existed. No. I may love my immediate family, but even with them i dont get along very well. so im not about to be best friends with people i dont even know. Sure, i feel bad because as i write this they’re sitting about 5 feet away and im not saying a word. But, i cant help it. i have nothing to say to them. Nothing in common. nor do i care. at least we’re taking them out again soon so that means i wont be forced to be near them. I feel bad. But fuck it. and im not about to change and be some happy, emotional, friendly fake person around them. ill be monotone, keep-to-myself, serious Jeffrey. If they dont like it, well they can get over it. Although i know this will come back to bite me in the ass after they leave and my parents have the freedom to talk to me in any way they can.
